The truth... there is hope and light to be shed where it can seem so dark. Through out my 57 years I have more often than not been considered by others as optimistic, positive,encouraging,funny,witty,
charming,kind,loving unconditionally, living to serve others before myself.

I considered all the above to be a reflection of my faith.

2012 marked the beginning of my darkest days to come ...I found myself giving up. The straw had broken the camels wasnt the horrible and painful mistakes/malpractise made by my surgeon that did me in... No it was the surgery that didnt take place that did me in...thats right the last neck surgery I would need to help with instability. First attempt was anterior approach. I was awoken and told we are so sorry but we had to abort...your signals shut down and we could not go forward with your operation because you are too high risk for paralasis...four months later I was back on the operating table, this time we were doing a post-anterior approach... Only to be awoken again with the deepest appologys again we are so sorry we had to abort again your signals shut off and you were too high of risk for perminate paralisys and I am afraid you are not going ever going to be surgically repairable... You are going to have to take pain medication for the rest of your life.

However, its better than being in a wheel chair and still having to live with pain.#..after years of remaining hopeful...paralisis. From my date of injury 2/17/2005 to 12/8/2012 Months of testing,physical therapy and then my fusion 9/8/2006 first mistake surgeon takes plate off of section C5-6 with non union causeing instabilty and horriffic pain... 5/2/2008 revision surgery second mistake causeing a hole in my spinal cord and BMP allowed to mix in my spinal fluid... The weeks following new and worsening pain...6/2009 knee surgery to fix a tear caused by a pithole in a buisness parking lot....4/2010 hystorectomy....5/2010 left side from my face down my entire left side becomes paralized...followed months of testing, I am back on the operating table again fir my spinal cord untethering...during this surgery my new surgeon had planned to fuse C7-T1 however, the surgery ran 8 hours and my surgeon felt he should schedule my fusion after I had an oppirtunity to recover. In between my father passes away,my brother has a heart attack, then my mom passes away. In 2013 I have an MRI to finally look into intervention for my lumbar spine which was injured the same day 2/17/2005 work related. Because my neck had so many obsticles my lumbar had to wait. Then it's discovered I have a tumor lumbar L4...By this time workmans comp insurer wants me gone. Thats a entirely different tragedy, but ling story short mt son and daughter in law are going to start their family so I needed to move from Denver to California asap. I relocate 9/18/2014... I have the tumor removed 4/14/2015 ...surgeon says you are all better...yet I didnt trust him...I ask my new CA primary care doc for second opinion...He treats my request as obsurd and sends me for a second opinion but not with a specialist. I explain that I didnt trust the nero surgeon who removed the tumor...small town bites me in the rear...primary care tells his buddy the nero surgeon that I didnt trust him...primary care doc sends me back to that nero surgeon and not a different nero as I had asked...the nero tells me that no one in that office is interested in treating me...evidently theres only one office in this small northern CA city and theres only 3 nero surgeons in that same office... By the grace of God I was afforded a appt. With Oncologist in our little town. Fortunately for me she was unable to do further texting...she referred me to UC Davis cancer center. Keep in mind I was told the tumor was completely gone and to follow up in one gut knew that wasnt right. The said thing is that doctors would rather lie when they dont know instead of I dont know the answer but I will find out or find someone who does most recent discovery is nodules on my be continued.

My information is substancial and rather lengthy however, once I have developed bullet points,and a reduced outline I will log in and attach it. Worth the wait thats for sure.

Currently I suffer with .....severe depression, low energy levels, weight gain, isolation followed by episodes of gambleing my entire monthly paycheck followed by having to use food pantrys at the salvation army for food because I gambled my entire pay. I have been blameing myself and isolateing myself out of shame. I do not drink alcohol at all... therefore I am just now abke to see the correlations from the time I started Lyrica and my gambleing. I have a strong heartfelt desire to assist others towards and through the journey of freedom from gambling and other obsessive behaviors which will keep us in the dark of our self created isolation. If we try to beat this dragon on our own...
It is true...what doesnt kill us does make us stronger...I am here for anyone who is ready to benefit from my assitance with building a care plan...its is just that...I lets make plans

Drugs: Lyrica, Cymbalta, Oxycontin, Oxycodone, Valium, Gleevec, Ibu, Cannabis sativa, Magnesium, Vitamin c, Echinacea, Vitamin d, B-12, Ginseng, Centrum silver, Biotin

Conditions: Traumatic lumbar puncture, Herniated nucleus pulposus (slipped disk), Lumbar spinal stenosis, Thyroid nodule, Hypothyroidism, Knee pain, Intervertebral disc degeneration, Depression postoperative, Sleep disorder, Insomnia, Low sex, Spinal fusion, Spinal claudication, Spinal haemangioma, Neck pain, Back pain - low, Lumbar spinal stenosis, Spinal cord neoplasm, Spinal cord ischaemia, Weight increased

Monthly rate: $25.00

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